New Year’s Resolutions

If 2006 was a year of bad beats, then let the PokerPlayer team regale you with their 2006 vows

MARK ‘SHAFTY’ STUART PokerPlayer Production Editor

I am going to get good at Triple Draw because it’s a newish game and there are lots of suckers who play it unwisely.

I’m going to tighten up my game. I’m going to read Sklansky and employ Sklansky. After all bluffing’s only fun for a short time and then, like getting a dog for Christmas, the novelty soon wears off when your all-in bet with 7-2 off-suit is called by a guy holding trip Queens. Poker is a simple game – if you play good cards, chances are you’ll win. Especially online where it’s hard to get a read on other players. So my path is set – qualify for the WSOP, take first prize and become a regular at the Bellagio. The future’s bright, the future’s tight.

ROY ‘THE BOY’ BRINDLEY Professional poker player

I vow not to be unwittingly quoted by a Swedish poker magazine as saying: ‘Swedish poker players are invariably drunken spiky-haired spoiled brats equipped with putrid retro clothing and an arrogant attitude.’

DAVE WOODS PokerPlayer Editor-in-Chief

I will resist playing poker after work if I’m due to meet someone for a drink. I invariably get the jitters after 10 minutes, start eyeing my watch nervously, playing hands badly, and yet still end up leaving them waiting for half an hour before I eventually go out on the bubble. I’m also going to attempt to exorcise my fixation with J-10, although I fear it may be harder to give up than cigarettes. And that took me fi ve years. Since a treble-through infatuation it’s been nothing but heartache, culminating in a game where I was explaining why I shouldn’t play it, but couldn’t help it, only for someone to call my allin and bust me out with… J-10! Oh and I’ll finally tie HillyTheFish down on a percentage deal if he wins the 2006 WSOP and stop being fobbed off with the ‘I’ll buy you a bottle of champagne’ line.

NICK WEALTHALL TV presenter, journalist

1 I will stop flicking my Vs at players I bluff online while laughing manically. 2 I will stop winding up yanks online. 3 I will stop watching DVDs/eating dinner/ browsing porn while playing online. 4 I will stop giving a running commentary when playing in a live game. 5 I will stop trying to go to the toilet without missing an online hand – it can’t be done and it’s messy. If 2005 was a catalogue of bad beats, then let the PokerPlayer team regale you with their personal dos and don’ts for the next 12 months at the baize…

MICHAEL KAPLAN Author, journalist

I am going to get good at Triple Draw because it’s a newish game and there are lots of suckers who play it unwisely. The online games, apparently, are a predator’s dream. I’m also planning on kicking ass in my Omaha home game for similar reasons – most of the guys I play with (and, if anyone from the weekly game is reading this, I’m not writing about you) go in with garbage and can never get away from high pairs (often, the pairs that they should have folded pre-fl op). In more general terms, the goal is to win more money at poker without having to knock heads with the best players. If this fails, here is my resolution for 2007: Take up Keno.

MATT BROUGHTON PokerPlayer writer

I’ve spent far too much of 2005 in my pants, hunched over a laptop, bashing away hour after hour. Online poker is a solitary, insular, smelly way to enjoy what is – let’s agree – a great experience with real humans in a real location. I started playing poker because I love the social aspect and it’s time to embrace that again. I’ve invested in a new card protector and plan to buy some trousers with my Xmas money from Nan. See you, fully clothed, down the cardroom in 2006!

RICHARD ‘DUDEK’ DOWNEY PokerPlayer Publisher

I’m finally going to pluck up the courage to play a live tournament in Vegas. The excuse I’ve always given is that I don’t want to be sat there for four hours or more when I could be on the golf course or in the pool, when, of course, the real truth is that I’m scared. Scared of losing, scared of making a fool of myself, scared of people talking to me at the table. Well, I refuse to be scared anymore and I’m going straight in at the deep end. The 9am $10 sit-and-go tournament will not know what has hit it.

RICK ‘THE RAGE’ DACEY PokerPlayer News Editor

From January 1, Rick ‘The Rage’ Dacey will be a more sensible, reserved and conservative person. Someone who waits until it’s their turn to act, does not swear when he gets shafted by runnerrunner flushes, nor threatens colleagues with physical retribution when they get on his tits. I shall no longer chase cards but let them come to me. Unless I get Q-7, of course, then I’ll move all-in and be damned the consequences.

GRUB SMITH TV presenter and writer

You know what went wrong with poker in 2005? Far too many people got better at it than me. Next year I’m going to level the playing fi eld, by reverting to the kind of poker I used to play 15 years ago in home games. Back then, Hold’em was a boring call for a round of dealer’s choice – the action games were wild variations like six-card Omaha Hi-Lo, Baseball, or Queens and Friends. Skill didn’t come into it. It was just a fast, fun way to spend an evening, and by the end of the year we all ended up with the same amount of cash we’d started with. Right now, that would feel fantastic.

Pin It

Comments are closed.